Forgiveness doesn't come easy.

Summarizing the last two days, I’m going to say that forgiveness didn’t come easy. Sometimes it’s not difficult to forgive other people, but to forgive ourselves.

Why does this happen?

I think we have a tougher time forgiving ourselves because it’s extremely hard to make our brain understand and accept that things won’t change. Our only healthy option is to grow, improve, let go and move on. The voice in our head keeps saying that we don’t deserve to be happy. In the same time, we can’t let go because it really bugs us. In the dark times, that voice can be very cruel. I’m sure you know what I’m talking about. Nothing satisfies it. Nothing is enough. No matter what good thing you do, it keeps putting you down, over and over and over again.

Forgiving other people is easier because they are outside of us, physically. If you don’t see or talk to them for a while, it definitely makes things easier. What we feel about them is, indeed, inside our head but that goes away in time with or without us doing something about it. If we don’t keep on remembering it, it’s going to lose its power. There are some who really can’t let go of things, because their mind is so fixated on that bad feeling that they don’t allow themselves to live their lives. This is really bad, it’s going to eat you alive. Life is short, it’s not worth keeping a grudge. We’ll talk more about the art of letting go, some other time.

“How do we forgive ourselves exactly?”

The universal answer for this question is: let go and move on. Easier said than done, right?

Here’s the thing, every situation is different, every person sees things in a way that might be the same with others. That’s why it’s hard to give a recipe for success, in this case.

For instance, psychologists recommend that you write two letters to the person that hurt you: 

1. Tell him/her the reasons why you were hurt.

2. Thank him/her for their contribution to your life.